tibe2 terpk nak tulis psl benda ni... something to ponder...hhmmmmmmmmm...
before i proceed with this so-called-sensitive- yet-a-common issue, i would like to highlight that im NOT against poligamy.. coz by doing dat, akidah kiter dah boleh "lari". ok.
i dun see & get it why our people are becoming very much westernized nowadays... kawin je cerai..kawin je cerai.. got married at a young age is practically good enuff in Islam (dpt la menjauhkn dosa berkepit dgn yg bkn muhrim), but in the end, bergadoh bagai nak rak dgn alasan konon dah tak serasi, mertua msk campur, bla bla bla.. then cerai with a common "tagline" - IRRECONCILEABLE DIFFERENCES.
so due to this, a lot of our people (as in MUSLIM) opt to living together as a non-married couple a.k.a bersekedudukan... senang. tak kawin. tak habis duit nak buat kenduri/hantaran/mas kahwin. no strong/concrete bond & commitment. klw break up tak payah naik turun mahkamah and family pun tak tanggung malu. huh! sounds easy kan.. yup, it is easy...as easy as it sounds.. but would it be easy for the person to answer for wut he/she did in front of Allah in the hereafter?????
Ok. Ini citer kalau dia tak nak kawin.
Yg agak parah jugak when the guy starts to get bored & fed up with the wife (dgn mcm2 alasan lah), pastu nk angkat kaki just like that. Aku PELIK la manusia2 mcm ni, serious pelik..
hello!!! Mase bercinta sanggup sehidup semati. Willing to accept each others’ weaknesses. Mase wedding vow, for better and for the worse, till death do us part, bla bla bla bla.. tapi lps kawin, bile tiba2 isteri ade penyakit, dapat anak lambat sikit, service not to what he expected, tup tap tup tap nak kawin dengan girlfren baru. I even have a fren which has the same case like this (byk lagi yg lain sbnrnyer..but her story is the closest one la). Got married, not so long after that she fell sick, so nak tak nak she had to depend on steroids which her doc advised not a suitable time to conceive. The hubby got fed-up with her ill condition (br brp bulan jer after kawin…), he found himself a betina lain, pegi keja balik keje, tmn shopping, kluar duit, bwk balik rumah with the cheapskate betina. Yg bini ni dok muntah2 kat umah, kluar masuk hospital, gi & balik ofis naik bas sendiri, & other things yg aku pun tak sampai hati nak citer la.
The best part was, the husband jatuhkan talak when she was on the hospital bed, STILL WARDED!!!! Taraaa! Terror tak mamat tu..woohooo! kire macho la bley buat perempuan mcm tuh! Dahsyat la lu bro!
Ok. Ni cerita kalau mangkuk tu masih ade air muka nak aniaya anak orang. Case dah fed up tgk muke isteri sendiri.
Yg ini which tak kurang hebat nyer jugak. Dah ada bini yg selama ni hidup susah senang sama2, mampu bagi zuriat, in fact same2 cari rezeki just to share the hubby’s financial burden. Again please, i did not mean to generalize every situation but this is what most men do (tak kire di bandar atau di kampung).
Dah kawin berbelas/berpuluh thn ni, tibe2 berkenan dgn secretary sendiri la, staff sendiri la, anak dara jiran kat kampong lar, anak tauke jual ayam kat pasar yg dia slalu pegi la, & ntah mcm2 lagi…tapi mesti ada ciri2 MUDA – BERGETAH – SEXY/LAWA. Otak cam lembu (bimbo) pun x de hal. Wahai lelaki, nabi kahwin lebih dari satu semata-mata untuk menyelamatkan balu yg suaminya syahid di medan perang, wanita yg sudah berumur, balu tawanan perang yg berketurunan yahudi untuk bebaskan dia, hamba perempuan yg mempunyai khitabah (hutang) yg tak mampu dijelaskan juga untuk dibebaskan, sahabat2 yg minta utk bermenantukan Rasulullah. Bukan semata-mata untuk makanan nafsu baginda. (kalau tak tau ni semua, gi google la! baca buku ke! dgr ceramah ke!)
Hehe..mase ni dan-dan la kluar statement nk ikut sunnah nabi, “mampu” (ker????), boleh bersikap adil, dah jodoh & etc.
Jap2…aku jawab satu2 eh…
1) hhmm…sunnah nabi eh? Yg nabi buat solat tahajjud every nite smpai bengkak2 kaki tu ko ikut x? nabi berjihad fisabilillah ko join ke? nabi bersedekah kesemua hartanya utk fakir miskin, ko buat ke? nabi masih boleh bersabar w/pun sampai tahap kaum2 jahiliyah lempar najis pada dia, ko boleh ikut ke? semut api geget pun dah menyumpah.. kalau kesemua ni tak boleh buat, apsal part nafsu nak ikut sangat?? Ckp je la dah miang, tak payah bg alasan hypocrite - ikut sunnah nabi..
2) mampu? Seriously mampu? How can u be so sure that u are able to provide EVERYTHING to accommodate the needs of your wives? Tu belum masuk anak-anak lagi. & jgn lupe keluarga mertuaS… ok, in terms of nafsu, fine, Viagra bersepah. Financially? Kalau poket besar, k fine. Boleh consider lg. hhmm.. wut about Spiritually? Educationally? Loves?
3) I really like this one & would love to hear from the people who actually practicing this..huhu. ADIL. Panjang kalau nk hujah psl adil ni alone. Lets start with, what is the definition of being adil? Adil ni byk cabang beb! As far as human being is concern, we are not maksum, unless we are prophet. How adil can u be to your wives? How long can u be adil yg hakiki to your wives? Im sure kalau siapa2 yg ade anak lebih dari satu, mesti ade salah seorang yang akan lebih disayangi compared to the rest. Paling pun yang paling dirapati. Maybe parents tu sendiri tak perasan, so dia rase la dia dah cukup adil pada anak2 dia, tapi orang lain boleh judge since the differences can be observed. Don’t u think this situation same goes to having more-than-1-wife situation??... And we know that being a fair leader is indeed required by Islam since it’s the back bone of a strong & healthy community which due to that, it will be one of the first questions to be asked by God.
4) “dah jodoh, nak buat mcm mane…”. Another common phrase. Kalau dah berpegang dengan kata-kata mcm ni, ape kate ko duduk je kat rumah, tak payah buat ape2. tak perlu susahkan diri pegi kerja, tak payah cari duit, tak payah cari makanan, kalau sakit, tak payah sibuk2 cari ubat. Duk melongok goyang kaki kat rumah. “Kan rezeki, jodoh, ajal tu semua di tangan Tuhan”!! amacam ok???
I would like to stress that this is only my thought & my perception towards this issue based on the actual cases that the people who are close to me had been experienced + yang memang nampak dpn mata kepala ku sendiri + other sources.. However, polygamy is admittedly considerable since the numbers of women are greater than men. Tapi sebelum buat apa-apa pun keputusan, fikirlah dalam2 dulu. Jgn sampai menganiaya orang lain. Sesungguhnya Allah taala itu Maha Adil. What goes around comes around. Wallahua’lam.
..amik berkat nih... semoga aura kau melekat kat aku.. hehe.. ;p
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