Aku semakin terus akui usia tidak semestinya menunjukkan kematangan.

Entry kali ni bukanlah tujuan untuk condemn dan mengaibkan sesiapa. Its more into questioning the so called Malaysians’ all-time slogan ‘Budi Bahasa Budaya Kita’ that has becoming unreflective and lack of its value from being embedded in our daily lives practicalities. Who to blame? Is it the slogan or the people? After diagnosing the cause, what’s next? Change the slogan? Or transform and educate the sickening human behavioural?
Hhhmm…….

From the above, my brain initialized the signals to my hand which triggered me to write about this. It started of when my fren went to this wedding. I don’t want to mention the bride’s name & her family here as everybody might be knowing her celebrity sister. These couples were actually our juniors in high school and the groom is also a neighbour to my fren. Aku pun tak tau depa ni dok bercouple since skolah lagi & apparently they were destined to be together until now, Alhamdulillah.

Despite all the glamorous fancy mincy wedding gowns (or suits I must say) plus the whole set ups which blend along with its indonesian touches as that was the main theme for their wedding, still my interest was not belongs to it.

Well it belongs to the groom’s family. Particularly on his ‘pilot’ dad. I suppose its becoming our custom in every wedding to have marhaban or Quran reciting or at least a simple doa before the event officially starts. And this one was not excluded for having a front slot for it. The event started off really well and like any other wedding, there will be someone or maybe more who representing any sides of the groom’s or bride’s families, just to crack laughter with jokes, delivering nice & touching speech to the newly wedded couple, lovely slide shows or maybe some cool musical performances. All of these ‘colors’ are definitely needed to enlighten the wedding atmosphere so nobody will leave the place unexpectantly…huhu..

But in accomplishing it, there’s always a line to limit yourself from getting too ‘far’ and going out of the place even though it’s a tiny one. Unlike what happened, the groom’s father was actually had so much fun of entertaining people with countless of dirty jokes (which my fren cakap nak gelak pun cam tak kuasa nyer hai!..) that really left everyone with wide eyes opened and of course…disbelieves! It goes something like these:-

“Oh u know xxxxxxxx, im a pilot & so does my son. And lemme tell u something here, to please a pilot’s heart, u will just have to do it thru his stomach…or maybe ‘below’ the stomach!”…pastu gelak ha hu ha hu ha hu ha… tak per ni lepak lagi. Then he continued with more obvious ones - “U know xxxx likes to play football…and also basketball…or maybe any sports involving balls but it might be smaller in size like a uh oh...golf ball?” And these idiot jokes have taken place for 15 minutes or more.
Pastu dengan tibe-tibenyer he changes the topic to – Gen 2.
“Well, pilot is usually picky when it comes to driving cars. Thrills and excitements being felt when our hands are steering well-manoeuvred engines just like how we handle the craft. Bla bla bla bla… However, sometimes we just have to use our Malaysia-made car, u know like the Gen 2. Gen 2 is good”. Pastu ha hua ha hua hiha lagi..

Soon the emcee took over the stage, he was some sort like ‘helping’ to explain, “Untuk pengetahuan anda semua, Gen 2 yang dimaksudkan tadi ialah Janda Anak 2".

Rite! WTF?? Upon hearing the story, I was like… Aper cer la pakcik ni…?? Mabok ko apo? What was his motive in the first place? What he was actually trying to do? Giler tak lawak langsung dowh! I asked my fren, “Abih kau gelak jugak? How did xxxxxxxx reacts to it?”

My fren jawab, “mule-mule tu aku cam senyum jer la coz the family members were standing near me, so kena cover sket. Lama-lama tu sangat menyampah lar! Aku tak tengok sangat kat pengatin coz aku duduk membelakangkan stage. I mean u have to behave accordingly la kan.. kita ni orang islam. I know him. His families are ok. Tak la plak aku sangka dia leh wat cenggini on his own son’s wedding. Aku yang malu tau tak jar…”

Aku setuju - “Exactly! Ape? By doing that, it shows how liberal he is, is that it? Fine, most of your families are pilot. But seriously, SO WHAT?! Which part of it that has got to do with contaminating the pureness of a nuptial? For God sake, father si xxxxxxx tu dah la orang alim, family dia baik-baik. Even though u felt shamelessly nothing & totally out of guilt with what u did, at least just have some respects to your new extended family as in your OWN BESAN and the rest of the invitees la ok.

Being funny is undeniably likeable and most people enjoy it very much. It looses the tense in the air. And to insert dirty jokes in between your speech is also acceptable in formal events like wedding but do it in a subtle & well-mannered way lar.

FYI, the same thing had happened on his eldest son’s wedding. A well-planned powerpoint slides were being played. Guess what was the joke? Have you all heard or read anywhere about a story of 3 daughters whom got married & the father would ask them every week how their hubbys are like. And each of them will give a simple answer that explains everything. Well the simplest would be a tagline la kan. The first 2 sisters gave taglines for Celcom & ape ntah...(sori, luper). When came the youngest one’s turn, she said, Kini, setiap hari, 7 kali seminggu – MAS’s tagline! Lelucon macam ni memang la takde menda sangat bile BACA SORANG-SORANG, but certainly not a wedding teaser! Memang sengaja nak jadi bahan la dey all ni..

I like my fren’s sis nyer statement, “I cant wait for the next wedding!” kui kui kui kui....;p

quiz yang suam-suam kuku best dia (3)

Ajis

Ajis atau Aziz lakonan Aziz Sattar memang sesuai dengan peribadi anda. Suka mengusik dan menyakat, tetapi manja dengan teman-teman rapat. Anda juga suka mengalah dengan member2, kalau naik beca tu anda takdahal nak duduk kat lantai beca tu. Anda suka memasak bila ada masa lapang, tetapi awas, kadang2 ayam yang anda masak boleh bertukar menjadi kayu.

quiz yang tak berapa nak pandai (2)

Bisu dan Pekak!!!!

Tahniah!!! Anda bakal memiliki seorang Ibu Mertua yang Bisu dan Pekak.. Jadi anda tak perlu bimbang untuk berkata kata dan tak perlu gusar untuk mendapat komen atau komplen dari mak mertua anda tu... ;p

quiz yang tak berapa nak pandai (1)

Hajar took the ADAKAH ANDA SEORANG LELAKI, PEREMPUAN ATAU PUN BAPOK? quiz and the result is WOW!! SYABAS SYABAS!! ANDA SEORANG LELAKI SEJATI. KUAT DI DALAM DAN KUAT DI LUAR.

TIADA APA YANG BOLEH DIPERTIKAIKAN LAGI KERANA SEMEMANGNYA ANDA SEORANG LELAKI SEJATI. ANDA KERAS DI DALAM DAN KERAS DI LUAR. SUSUK TUBUH ANDA MENJADI KEGILAAN ANAK GADIS, JANDA DAN BAHKAN JUGA DUDA. LELAKI-LELAKI LAIN MEMANDANG ANDA DENGAN PANDANGAN YANG SANGAT TIDAK PUAS HATI KERANA KINI KEKASIH-KEKASIH MEREKA SUDAH MENJADI HAK MILIK MUTLAK ANDA. TETAPI BERHATI-HATI KERANA ANDA MUNGKIN BERPOTENSI UNTUK DIPUKUL DENGAN HELMET ATAUPUN SPANAR 14. PANDANG-PANDANGLA KE BELAKANG!!

MELAMPAU!

Aku peeeeeennnnatttt/tired/letih/drained/capek/exhausted/dead-beat/worn-out/ sangat. This year’s financial end closing betul-betul mendera aku. Tertekan babe! Bayangkan tiap-tiap hari aku menatap menatang monitor tu 14-16 jam. Sekarang ni abg pa plak yang boleh balik awal dari aku..ha! kan pelik tu.

Aku dah sampai rumah, memang aku nampak katil je kat mata ni. Dah takde maknenyer nak online, update blog, check facebook,/frenster ke, ym ke, aku dah memang tak larat sangat. Banyak je sebenarnyer benda-benda nak tulis , tapi bile time nak tulis je, aku pikir ada baiknye aku tido. Just imagine kadang-kadang aku kena sambung kat rumah keje-keje tu walaupun balik dah lewat giler. Part ni paling menguji tahap iq tul! Hahaha…mane taknyer, naik pening kepala tahan ngantok,. Pehtu kepala non-stop tersengguk – tersengguk.

Yang lagi klakar, nak potong kuku pun tak menyempat. ade sekali tu, aku kena kejar mase sebab banyak lagi yang tak settle for another closing. Tengah buat kejer, perut plak sakit. Tak boleh nak tahan lagi, aku bawak kertas yang aku tengah reconcile tu & pencil. Sambil ‘layan’ sambil buat kejer... time nak kire..alamak! calculator tak bwk. Hmm..terpaksa kire bahagi manual (mcm zaman darjah-darjah dolu)… huhu…poyo tahap keliwon tul aku nih..eheh.

Sumtimes aku rase macam nak give up jer. Aku jadi macam tak mampu nak push myself further. Letih macam nak koma. I need a break. I need some vacation. A relaxing place kinda thing. Cuti budak-budak finance kena freeze berbulan-bulan because of this year end closing. So sekarang aku cam menyampah bile tengok department lain amik cuti. Ces…!! Jaga korang, account publish jer, aku amik cuti setahon!! Akan ku ‘spa’ & ‘sauna’ badanku ini….hhmpphh!

This time nyer year end memang melampau!!!